


Same Date, Different Year

by darkphoenix168



Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Birthday, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-06
Updated: 2020-06-06
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:41:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24566317
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkphoenix168/pseuds/darkphoenix168
Summary: Kanda Yuu has been plagued by dreams of a past life he knows nothing about. All he wants is them to go away for one night. Will a young man with a very distinctive but eerily familiar scar help him with that?
Relationships: Kanda Yuu/Allen Walker
Comments: 3
Kudos: 62





	Same Date, Different Year

**Author's Note:**

> A little something for Kanda Yuu's brithday!

_ The earth was  _ _ scorched and scarred _ _ ; some fires  _ _ were still burning, while others were nothing more than embers. _ _ Remains, both human and  _ _ demon, scattered across the field _ _. Some were still  _ _ fighting; _ _ others were running _ _ with screams on their lips _ _. _ _ A young man was doing his best to take on the hoards that were coming towards him.  _ _ For every  _ _ five that came down, two manage to get a hit in. He still staggered on, his long hair out of his ponytail  _ _ and down his back.  _

_ He didn’t care. _

_ Nothing was going to make him stop. He was going to get out of her alive and victorious _ _. All  _ _ he was focused on was  _ _ winning _ _. _ __

_ Until a voice stopped him cold. _

_ “KANDA!” _

_ The person he’d been fighting  _ _ side-by-side was _ _ no longer taking down demons was now being held by a taller one. He was struggling  _ _ fruitlessly, his legs kicking open air  _ _ and his trusty weapon being held by gnarled hands. _

_ “Kanda!” tears were now flowing freely down the scarred cheeks, “please! Run!” _

_ Run? Why? They’d been in worse situations _ _ they’d somehow survived. This would be the same.  _ _ It would be. _

_ “KANDA! _ _ RUN!” _

_ Kanda couldn’t listen to him. _ _ He was going to keep going, keep fighting _ _. That’s what he always did.  _

_ “KANDA!?” _

_ “SHUT UP!” _

_ The long sword shoved through his chest made the word fall  _ _ mute _ _. _

_ Kanda heard nothing as silver eyes looked down to the tip of the blade, blood dripping from his lips  _ _ down to his chin. He was just as surprised as Kanda was, his  _ _ whole-body _ __ _ trembling  _ _ in the  _ _ wake of the surprise attack. _

_ “ _ _ Kan _ _ … da…?” the young man  _ _ never  _ _ sound _ _ ed _ _ so weak, “Y—Yuu?” _

_ The silence was overbearing.  _ _ For a man that usually loved solitude _ _ and quiet, he wished there was some _ _ sound  _ _ to take him away from all this. _

_ “ _ _ Wh _ _ …  _ _ Wh _ _ …” _

_ Kanda couldn’t get the words out. _ _ His partner  _ _ just cried quietly, his lips quivering and fear in his eyes before: _

_ “H… Hurts…” _

_ The long fingers released  _ _ the body, letting the knees sink to the  _ _ grass. His body seemed to be held up by pure  _ _ shock _ _ , and then in an instant, his shoulder joined the  _ _ ground. _

_ “MOYASHI!” _

_ He tried to run to his partner, but the  _ _ claw coming for his face stopped him cold. _

“ AH !”

Al l the breath left the young man’s body, and he was left panting in his bed. The open curtains let the sunlight stream in to the rather sparse  bedroom and over his half-naked body. He ley there for a moment longer, taking in the simple wood furniture and white walls of his apartment, reminding him he was home and not on the battlefield dying.

Kanda Yuu sat up, his hand on his forehead and the pain behind his eyes ebbing away.

Again.

He was having that stupid dream again.

Groaning, Kanda pulled the sheets off him, feeling the sweat on the back of his neck. Maybe he should  talk to a doctor again, insist that the nightmares are bad enough to warrant medication. He’d never been one to push doctors , but maybe it would help him sleep better.

For now, he needed a shower.

His bed left to air out, Kanda turned to his showe r, and let the cool water wash over him.  Feeling clean relaxed him, and gave him some clarity. He hung his head in the shower, resting his forearm on the cool tile. 

A part of him didn’t want the dreams to leave.

There were the bad ones, the awful ones, but there were also loving and sweet dreams. Kind ones where th e dying man was beside him, kissing him, loving him . He didn’t want  _ those  _ dreams to go away. 

Just the bad ones. The ones where he couldn’t save him.

“This is so stupid.”

Dreams meant nothing. It had been a face in the crowd he’d seen once and then he’d gone to bed watching too much television or reading a fantasy novel.  It meant nothing, would mean nothing, and nothing would happen except he wouldn’t have as productive a  day.

He dressed quickly and ran to catching his bus to working, wishing the traffic wasn’t so bad so that he could take his bike out.

His life wasn’t nearly as exciting as the dream him was. He’d wake-up, work out, grab a shower, go to work, work out again, go home, make dinner, drink, and go to bed. Five days a week  that was his life, and on the  weekend, he’d  go for a long run around the hills near his house. He didn’t have many friends, his co-workers barely spoke to him, and he didn’t speak to his f amily back in Japan.

As he  preferred it that way .

He was already dreaming about  people he’d never met before dying horrifically and cruelly in front of his eyes, he didn’t want to feel that pain for real.

It was why he was spending the eve of his birthday alone in a pub nursing a beer.

“Unusual time for you.”

Kanda looked to the bartender, wondering what his name was again.

“I guess,” Kanda shrugged, looking down to the cold glass.

“Any reason? Or did you have another nightmare?”

A grim smirk came of Kanda’s face; he might not remember the  bartender or his name but he sure remembered his.

“Rough night,” Kanda admitted, taking another mouthful .

“Shame; rough nights can be the most fun with the right person.”

With that, he winked and turned to the next patron, leaving Kanda alone. He just stared at his pint of  beer, his appetite  for alcohol lost.

Meet someone? Why would he want that? They’d just get hurt, and he’d have to watch it happen, all over again . Kanda groaned at the though; m aybe he should just go home.

“Mind if I join you?”

Kanda turned to chase off the  young man, but stopped when he saw a very familiar scar pull into a very familiar grin.

“Hello,” he extended his hand to Kanda, “I’m Allen… Allen Walker.”

“Kanda…”

“Mind if I sit?”

Blue eyes just looked the young man up and down. He was a little bit shorter than Kanda, dressed in black jeans and a  navy-blue tank top. His left arm  was left exposed, and it was gnarled in some parts, but in others it was smooth and black and went up to just past the elbow . There were some s mooth circles on his shoulder, and Kanda was willing to bet there were spikes surrounding the  largest circle. The silver eyes were smiling and his white hair seemed deliberately mussed.

Allen looked just like he did in Kanda’s dreams /

“Sure… free bar,” Kanda shrugged, turning away from the young man.

“Thanks!”

He should have said no. Now the only thing on Kanda’s mind was the young man chatting up the bartender. He’d ordered his drink and something to eat and Kanda could  only  focus on the sound of his voice. It was feminine for a man, but  somehow distinctly male.  His accent wasn’t overly distinct, as though he’d been around many regions of England, and he smelt oddly of  pine and lemon. He occasionally snuck glan ces, taking in the sight of the long scar and the tattooed star on his forehead.

It was just so eerie. 

“So,” it was obvious now the object of Kanda’s attention had now turned to the  brooding young ma n, “what are you doing here?”

“Drinking,” Kanda lifted his second pint to signal for a third.

“Celebrating? Or drowning your sorrows?”

“Looking for solitude…”

“Might  be better done at home rather than a bar,” it was apparent he wasn’t  taking the hints Kanda was dropping,  “I like your accent,” Allen said, “where  about are you from?”

“Japan,” Kanda focused on his pint.

“ Oh cool! Whereabouts—”

“If you’re looking for some one  ‘ exotic ’ might I recommend a strip club.”

This made Allen stop and Kanda turn to his drink.

Turn him down now, cruelly and harshly,  and the young man would get mad, stomp his feet,  maybe throw his beer on Kanda, and leave. And Kanda could go back to living alone, with bad dreams and learning nothing from them.

“What makes you think  I’m only interested in you because your Japanese?”

Allen was smooth, slipping his hand close to Kanda’s and keeping the smile on his lips.

“Maybe… I’m interested in you… because you’re handsome…” white hair titled slowly, “ is there something wrong with that?”

Kanda just looked to the young man  sitting beside him, studying the rather cheeky features.

He really did look identical to the young man in his dreams.

“Make you a bet,” Allen lifted his full glass of beer, “I drink this faster than you,” he gestured to the half-full glass Kanda had been nursing, “and you answer me five questions.”

“Why five?” 

“Seemed like fair number,” Allen toasted to him, “three… two… one…”

* * *

Allen was a much better drinker than his physique let on. 

He was also a much better kisser.

Kanda didn’t remember how they’d gotten back to his apartment or why they were kissing or how Allen had convinced him to have sex but here they were, against Kanda’s bedroom wall, with their tongues in each other’s mouths. Kanda’s hair was pulled from the high ponytail and was now over his shoulders.  Not that Kanda cared; for once he let himself get swept up in the moment . Maybe this would be a good night; he’d get tired out and wouldn’t be able to dream of the young man who looked mysteriously like Allen dying.

“ Kanda…”

His name sounded so good on Allen’s lips.

“Nice place,” Allen mused,  lifting slowly up to Kanda and slipped the palm of his hand over the young man’s cheeks, “ better kisser.”

“ Che …”

“What? It’s flirting…”

“Just shut up.”

Allen’s laugh was smothered by  Kanda’s tongue in his mouth,  an action he did not resist. Hands gently pulled off the buttons on Kanda’s shirt, Kanda’s hands grabbing the tank top ’s hem and tugging it up over Allen’s head. It was only then did Allen move away from him, stepping back for a moment as his shirt was yanked over his head . Kanda saw a brief smile on Allen’s lips before he  continued kissing the elder.

Kanda  was left with his shirt half-undone, de spite Allen’s insistence , and pushed Allen onto his bed. The young man bounced, laughing before Kanda crawled on top of him .

“You’re so  _ good _ …” Allen breathed, his head tilting back to let Kanda  attack his neck.

The elder merely hummed , his hands running up the young man’s waist and pulling the body closer to his.

He almost didn’t know where all of this was coming from. He had had sexual partners in the past, but he would never count himself among the world’s best lovers. But with Allen… it was almost like he  knew every point and every place that would make him moan.

“ _ Ahh _ _ …” _

Allen’s fingers hooked in the hooks of Kanda’s belt loops, gently tugging and trying to get into Kanda’s pants. Kanda’s knee pressed into Allen’s groan, the elder slowly applying pressure while Allen slowly rocked his hips in response. 

“ So good, ” Allen panted, “ just kiss me… Yuu…”

A chill ran through Kanda’s veins, and Allen felt the lips slowly pull up and away from his body.

“Kanda?”

The young man turned angry in an instant. He grabbed the young man’s wrists harshly and stood over the now worried Allen.

“How do you know my name?” Kanda asked, pinning Allen’s arms above his head.

“You said it… at the pub— ”

“I said my name was Kanda,” his hand tightened on the wrists, “I never said my first name .”

“We’ve both been drinking—”

“I would’ve have remembered telling you,” Kanda was now over Allen, his eyes dangerous, “ I hate people calling me by that name. N ow the Hell do you know my name?”

“Lucky guess—”

“Bullshit!” now Kanda was angry, “tell me how! Or do I need to report a stalker ?”

Allen’s jaw tightened, becoming very aware of the position he was in. It was obvious he was looking for a way out , both literally and figuratively. He seemed ready to move, his legs adjusting and his back was tense.

And then, in a deep sigh, he relaxed.

“You know how,” Allen said, “you know…”

“TELL ME!”

Silver eyes looked up at Kanda with something  the man over top of him did not expect. Sadness, and  hope.

“Say my name…”

“Al—”

“Not that one,” Allen shook his head, “you know which one.”

Now Kanda was angry. He felt  a vice grip on his heart and blood roar in his ears. This should stop now; they needed to stop now. Kanda should just roll over and call the police while Allen grabs his clothes and run off.  But t he name just came off his tongue . He couldn’t stop it, and he didn’t want too.

“M… Moyashi…”

His hands relaxed around Allen’s wrist as all his strength suddenly left him.

He wanted to wonder why he knew that name, but in his heart of hearts he knew why he knew that name. Allen kept quiet  as his arms slipped over Kanda’s back and brought  their chests to touch. He hugged him tightly, Kanda could feel Allen’s heartbeat drumming in his  own chest.

“Hey there… Yuu…”

Kanda wished this wasn’t making him as happy as it was.

“I missed you,” Kanda could hear the tears in Allen’s voice, “ I missed you so much Yuu!”

They just stayed there for a moment longer, Kanda  in the crook of Allen’s neck and drinking the scent of the young man. It was so nostalgic, and made him want to fall asleep in the man’s arms. 

“NO!”

Allen stayed where he was, surprised by Kanda’s sudden outburst. Kanda had pushed away from him, keeping his hands up before he backed into a wall.

“Fate doesn’t exist!” Kanda said,  his hands over his head, “we’re not destined to be together!”

“Kanda—”

“This is some stupid coincidence! Nothing more!” he pointed to Allen, “ _ you  _ are nothing more to me! Those  _ stupid _ dreams are nothing to me!”

“Kanda, wait—”

“YOU NEED TO GO!”

Kanda sank to his knees, his head in his hands and  his breathing labored.

Dreams didn’t mean anything. He wasn’t dreaming of some past  life; he  just had  an overactive imagination . There was no past Kanda or past Allen , there was just Allen and Kanda. That was it, nothing more. 

“I agree…”

Allen sank to his knees, kneeling in front of Kanda but still giving him his space.

“I know we’re not  meant to be together… and I know it’s not fate that’s bringing us together,” Allen was gentle, “but… I want to know you… like he did… ”

Kanda didn’t want to  hear it. He wanted all this to go away . His dreams, his insom nia, Allen,  _ everything _ .

“I had those dreams too,” the young man admitted, “big floating monsters,  fighting with people only to have them die a moment later, travelling the land only to bring back comrades in caskets,” it was obvious  the memories hurt him, “but I remember his friends… how happy he was with them. How much he loved them… Lenalee, Lavi,  Krory , Johnny, Komui… Yuu…”

“Shut up…” Kanda whispered , his eyes avoiding Allen’s eyes.

“I loved some of those dreams,” Allen said, “I loved waking up in his arms, I loved getting to meditate with him, and watching him tend his garden or having  dinner with him in private or stealing a kiss in the dark hallways in the dead of night …” he swallowed his fear down, “I know you two aren’t the same… but when I saw you in the pu b tonight … I just wanted to know…”

“You should have just left me alone.”

“ I should have,” Allen agreed, “ but I couldn’t,” is jaw tightened, “and you couldn’t either.”

Kanda really wished Allen wasn’t  right. But he wasn’t going to admit it.

“What were you doing at the pu b that night?”

“I just finished a n  interview for studio space … wanted a bite to eat  before I headed home on a late train,” he looked to the elder, “and there you were. Just sitting there at the bar , looking exactly as I remembered him.”

It all just sounded so believable,  and Kanda wished it wasn’t.

“How long?”

“I guess… since I was fifteen,” Allen told him, “they were really  foggy , but they’ve gotten stronger as I got older ,” he gestured to Kanda, “you?”

“About… three years ago,” Kanda admitted, “they got bad recently.”

“How bad?”

“Take a guess,” Kanda whispered, “ it’s bad.”

Allen fell silent, his lips folding. 

“I’m sorry you had to remember that….” Allen whispered, “I just remember his face… I don’t think he’s ever—"

“Which plant… was your favorite?”

The question caught Allen off-guard.

“What?”

“You said you liked his garden,” Kanda said, “ so, which plant was your favorite.”

Allen looked at Kanda in confusion, his eyes tilting before:

“I loved the lotus he had,” Allen said, “but… I think my favorite was the ivy he planted under my window so that  it could grow up to meet  him …” he smiled  at the memory, “I think he stole it from some garden in England … can’t remember which one… ”

“Kew gardens…”

Kanda stood up and walked over to his balcony, pulling open the glass door and gesturing to a small potted plant in the corner of his balcony.

“I went back there to see if I was really there,” Kanda said, “ I found the ivy… I didn’t think it was the same plant… but I still wanted it.”

“Why?”

Allen’s question was innocent enough, and he met Kanda’s eyes when he asked.

“ When he first took it… i t was a date… I think… as much as those two could have a date…” Kanda gently thumbed the leaf of the plant, “ it was just…  peaceful. For the first time in forever I felt calm … and I felt compelled to just… take two  leaves …”

“And you did,” Allen smiled ,  looking back to the growing ivy , “it’s looking goo d.”

“It’s growing shockingly well,” Kanda said, “barely have to do anything.”

“Guess you have a green thumb too ,” Allen said, “lucky… I kill every plant I touch.”

Their conversation was so natural, it almost amazed Kanda. Allen seemed comfortable  with silence but when they talke d they were at ease with each other. It made Kanda think back to some of the dreams he’d have, where he remembered the other Allen  sitting beside him. They weren’t talking, but just  enjoying the mountain air in some European country . The scarred hand was over Kanda’s and the young man was leaning on the elder’s shoulder. It was a small reprieve from their Hellish life.

It made Kanda think. Maybe _ t _ _ hey  _ didn’t get the chance to  have  what they wanted, but he and Allen did. They were in a different time , had different lives. It wasn’t  purely picturesque, but  it was much better than being beholden to some archaic dictator. Maybe it would fizzle out in a week, or maybe it could be  _ something _ . Maybe they’d already had their chance and this was just another relationship headed for nothing but fights and anger .

“Kanda…”

He looked to the young man, now standing near him. He’d straightened his clothes  and put his hair back in place. Kanda felt his stomach tighten; a nagging thought in his head told him that this wasn’t something that was going to break apart in his hands. Because he knew Allen wouldn’t let that happen.

“I’m  gonna go,” Allen smiled sadly, “I leave my number  if yo u— ”

Kanda took Allen’s shirt in his hands, his  fierce lips on Allen’s and he all but forced the young man onto the mattress. Kanda slipped his knee between Allen’s legs , Allen now kissing him back. His fingers ha d slipped under Kanda’s shirt, his nails digging into the tight muscles and  drag his fingers down Kanda’s back.

“Kanda…”

Screw it.

He just wanted Allen right now; he’d sort out the rest tomorrow. 

And Allen seemed to agree.

His nails returned to Kanda’s chest , his own body arching  off the mattress . His legs and toes tensed as Kanda kissed  Allen’s neck and collar bone. Kanda’s fingers tweaked and plucked at  Allen’s nipples, turning the  skin around the  buds pink.

“Kanda… Kanda!”

“Got a problem with this?” Kanda whispered, kissing at Allen’s collarbone and leaving  dark marks over the skin.

“Ye—no—I—” Allen moaned, “tell me what you want…”

“You…”

That seemed to be enough for Allen. He grabbed Kanda’s shit and ripped open  the white button-up.  Allen’s fingers slipped under the shirt and dug his nails into Kanda’s back, moaning as lips sucked and bit him.

“You seem to remember… me well…” Allen groaned, his  grip tightening on the shoulder blades , “naughty boy…”

Kanda bit him a little harder at this comment. Allen yelped at the bite, kneeing him in the ribs playfully before something caught his eyes.

It was the Ohm symbol. There, on Kanda’s chest , exactly where it should be.

“You have it…” Allen’s fingers ran over the massive tattoo on his chest , “thought… you didn’t want it—”

“I couldn’t resist,” Kanda whispered, his lips kissing Allen’s kne es, “like can’t resist you.”

“Since when yare you this smooth?” Allen teased, the smile on his lips immovable as  he opened his legs a little wider.

“ I’m not him, remember?” Kanda’s fingers trailed Allen’s inner thigh, “lube is in the bedside table drawer. Condom too. ”

“How often… do you…  _ ahh _ …”

Allen’s question was cut off by Kanda’s t eeth on his thighs.

“You  gonna leave some marks?” Allen teased, barely regaining his breath.

“I’ll leave more than a few,” Kanda whispered, sinking his teeth into the pale flesh and making the legs around him tense.

“ _ Ahh-nng _ _ —” _ Allen giggled, taking in deep breaths, “you still know how to make me scream…” he passed Kanda  the lube and the condom, “for now at least.”

“Be careful teasing me,” Kanda whispered, coating his fingers in the slick substance,  pressing on Allen, “no telling what I’d do.”

“I know what you’d do,” Allen adjusted his body, “but… you might surprise me…” he smiled, “I hope you do…”

At once Kanda thrust two fingers into Allen, making his back arch like a taunt bow and the teasing smirk vanished. Allen’s mouth was now open and he was crying out in response. Kanda’s fingers  started to move slowly, pressing and stretching and widening as Allen writhed in response. His toes opened and flexed , and his hands reached above his head to clutch the  bedsheets above his head.

“ _ Ah… hah… Kanda…  _ _ ahh _ _ …” _

Allen sounded so much better than he’d dreamed .

“ _ Knada _ _ … go… deeper… _ ”

Kanda grabbed his thigh, pushing it up and doing his best to oblige the whimpering request . Allen moaned, his face turning a deep red.

“ _ Oh…  _ _ ohh _ _ …” _ Allen  panted, “ _ I missed you… ha _ !”

Kanda positioned himself between Allen’s legs,  the condom now out of his wrapper and on him. He gripped Allen’s hips, pulling the knees up and his fingers running over the smooth skin.

“You move fast…” Allen said.

“You complaining?”

“No,” Allen suddenly sat up, returning to kiss  Kanda, “but next time, we’re taking it slow…”

“For tonight?” Kanda asked between kisses,  pulling Allen into a tighter grip.

“I want you  _ now _ ,” Allen leaned forward to whisper in his ear, his teeth taking a moment to tug on Kanda’s earlobe with his teeth.

Kanda didn’t take Allen’s teasing lightly.

His fingers returned to Allen’s behind, slipping in his middle and ring finger . Allen moaned at the touch, his hips  jutting out  and his chest pressed against Kanda’s. 

“ Kandaaaa …  _ Hu! _ ”

Kanda wasn’t gentle.

“I thought you liked it rough,” Kanda whispered, his teeth to Allen’s throat.

“ _ I… hah…  _ _ ohh _ _ … _ ”

Nothing but gibberish came out of Allen’s mouth. His nails dug into Kanda , hard enough to make him bleed . Kanda’s hands tightened on Allen’s hips , the two now moving in unison . 

Allen was coherent enough to keep rhythm with Kanda, his thighs moving him  while Kanda kept him steady. Kanda watched as Allen’s face contorted, tears pricking at his eyes and running down his cheeks. He was saying something, something  Kanda couldn’t make out. His hands slipped to Allen’s lower back while the other  grasped Allen’s cock. The young man yelped in surprise at the touch . He looked down to watch as Kanda’s long fingers massaged and stroked hi m.

“Kanda!” Allen moaned, “ _ no-no fair _ !”

“Too bad…  _ mo-ya-shi _ …”

Each syllable made  Allen tense tighter. He buried his nose in Kanda’s neck,  drinking in Kanda’s raw scent.

“Y-You’re mean… Yuu…” Allen whispered,  adjusting to the young man rubbing inside of him.

“I told you… don’t tease me…” Kanda was panting now, bringing his lips to Allen’s.

Allen hummed into the kiss. His fingers threaded through the long locks and angling the young man ’s jaw.

“ _ I missed you… Yuu…” _

“ Bakamoyashi …” Kanda teased, parting slowly, “ I know…”

“You’re… supposed to say… I miss you too,” Allen panted, his hips  adjusting to get a deeper angle, “moron…”

“Too bad,”  Kanda gripped the young man’s b ackside, angling him further and hearing him scream more and more.

“ _ I’ll… be mad _ _ … at you later…” _ Allen was willingly returning to incoherency , “ _ there… go deeper… _ ”

Kanda got rougher and more feral as the two of them came closer and closer  to their climax. Allen was far more honest in the bedroom , and Kanda took advantage of it. Allen’s  nails found purchase with Kanda’s chest,  leaving marks in the black ink and pressing his cheek into Kanda’s collarbone.

“ _ Kanda… YUU!” _

Teeth ground as Allen suddenly tightened around him, the fingers digging into  Allen’s hips and leaving the marks Kanda promised.

What was left of them were two panting, sweating young men. Kanda had Allen’s seamen on his stomach and disheveled Allen  was gasping for air on his chest .

“Sorry… about your um…”

“Don’t worry about it,” Kanda said,  gently guiding Allen to the mattress , “I’ll get cleaned up…”

The younger nodded, watching as Kanda pulled out, tied up the condom and threw it out. He made quick work in the bathroom, and returned with a damp cloth.  To his immense surprise, Allen was still there. The covers were now pulled up to his chest and he was still awake.

“You’re still here,” Kanda commented, tossing him the towel.

“You want me gone?” Allen asked, dabbing his neck, chest, and thighs.

“ D idn’t say that ,” Kanda said, settling in bed beside Allen . In response, Allen snuggled up on his chest and brought Kanda’s arm over his shoulder. He sighed deeply, the silver eyes closing as he listened to the heartbeat drum in Kanda’s chest.

“You’re really here…”

Kanda’s lips unconsciously found the crown of white hair, wishing Allen would stop vocalizing his thoughts.

“ As good as you  remembered ?”

“No,” Allen smiled up to Kanda, “this is better… because you’re all mine .”

Allen’s grin brought up a smile on Kanda’s lips. Small to be sure, but a smile none-the-less.

“What do you want me to do… in the morning?” Allen asked, enjoying Kanda’s thumb rub his bicep .

“Whatever you want ,” Kanda said, “why?”

“What do  _ you _ want?” the younger emphasized, “I know what I want…”

Kanda met Allen’s eyes. They were the same silver, just as strong, just as determined,  but no longer hiding all the pain that they used too. 

“I don’t know what I want,” Kanda finally admitted , “but I like being with you…”

“I like being with you too,” Allen smiled, “ I’d like… to be with you a little longer…”

The young man nodded in Allen’s hair.

“Think we can make this work?”

“Why not?” Kanda asked, his fingers running over Allen’s shoulder .

“Well… I know him… not you,” he looked up to Kanda, “and you know him… not me…”

“Then I guess that’s where we have to start .”

Allen chest swelled with happiness .

“We’ll start tomorrow,” Kanda said, “I’m tired…”

Allen kept quiet, smiling up at Kanda before he settled in for the night, stopping to check his phone .

“Hey Kanda…”

“ Hm ?” Kanda  settled into bed.

“Are your birthday’s the same?”

“Yeah, why?”

Allen adjusted his head, rolling over and resting his cheeks on crossed arms . He smiled so warmly that Kanda felt his heart skip a beat.

“Happy birthday… Yuu…”

He showed Kanda his phone, the young man taking note of the early hours of the morning.

“I’ll take you for tea tomorrow morning to celebrate,” Allen gave him a goodnight kiss, “ we can finally celebrate... like they  wanted too...”

“I don’t want to celebrate like they wanted too,” Kanda said, his knuckles running over Allen’s cheeks, “I want to celebrate  cause we want too.”

“That... sounds amazing,” Allen laughed, giving Kanda one last slow kiss before they both settled into a dreamless sleep, for the first time in forever.


End file.
